By Shane's FamilyJune 23, 2004 Michael Shane Dysinger was born into this Life in the early morning hours of August 25, 1974 - in Wichita, Kansas. His life ended in the early morning hours of January 20, 2001 - in Wichita, Kansas. Given all of his travels during his short lifetime, as we look back on things, it seems somewhat ironic to his family that his life began and ended in virtually the same place - just a matter of blocks apart Shane was only 26 years old when he was killed by the wanton, reckless behavior of a drunk driver. During her trial this woman's attorney kept referring to her as a "young woman". We've wondered many times - did this woman, her attorney, and her family know how young Shane was when she killed him - he was a "young man". Shane was the only son his father and mother will ever have. He was a fun-loving, kind, compassionate son. He was the only brother his sister, Gina, will ever have. She loved him with all her heart, a heart that broke into a million pieces when she received the call early that dreadful morning - not hardly able to comprehend that her mother was telling her her beloved Shane had been killed. Gina and her husband, Matt, now have a beautiful niece who bears Shane's namesake. Shane was the only father his then five-year-old son, Brendan, will ever have. This is a sweet little boy who started kindergarten the year his father was killed - and, when asked at school about his parents, could only tell them that his Daddy was in heaven. He was the husband of a loving wife - united in marriage only a short three and a half months before he was killed. Shane has aged grandparents who must now live out their golden years with sadness and heartache because a young woman chose to get in her car early that fateful morning and take her drunken ride that condemned Shane to his death! Shane was part of a large, loving family unit - all of whom will forever grieve for him. Shane was a Staff Sergeant in the Air Force Reserves, on active duty for training purposes. He had a promising career in the Air Force, with plans to continue his service and further his education. He was given a full military funeral service, with all the honors bestowed upon those serving their country in the military. Shane's family was so very proud of him. When the phone rang in our home in the early morning hours of January 20, 2001, our lives, as we knew them then, were forever changed! We got the call no parent ever wants to get. As Shane's mother, I had to call his sister, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and friends and tell them Shane was gone. I wish the woman who killed him would have been made to stand by my side and listen to the screams and cries and moans from his family as, one by one, they learned of his death. I wish she would have had to travel with his family as they made their way to the funeral home to make arrangements for his funeral service and burial. I wish she would have had to stand with us beside Shane's casket and look at a person we could not even recognize as the Shane we knew. Shane was a nice-looking young man but, even the funeral director's best efforts could not repair the damage done to him. As we stood and looked at his poor, broken body, we understood then what the coroner was so gently trying to tell us on the phone the day Shane died when she suggested we not have an open casket at the funeral service She was right; Shane's family requested that the casket be closed during his service. No one should have to die such a violent death as Shane did - no one deserves to die that way. The woman who took Shane's life from him was sentenced to five and a half years in prison - just short of the maximum number of months and years she could have received for the crime she committed and was convicted of. Small consolation for taking a human life as the result of being drunk and driving a car. But, now, we must deal with the fact that, due to a loophole in the Kansas laws, she will soon be released from prison a full two years early from her original sentence. Tragedy strikes us again! Although Shane's family has never received any indication from this woman that she is truly sorry for having taken Shane's life, we sincerely hope that her short period of incarceration has brought her to terms with what she has done. When this woman steps out of prison and back into freedom this coming September, all Shane's family can hope for is that she realizes how fortunate she is that she will be going back home to her family. As the judge so aptly told her the day she was sentenced to prison - "you will one day go back to your family but, Michael Dysinger is gone forever". Although it has been three and a half years since Shane's death, and his family has had to "go on with life", there's never a day that he's not in our thoughts and memories. Life has been a struggle for all of us since that cold, dark, dreadful morning - but, we have been so very fortunate to have the support and help of not only our family members and friends, but also, of wonderful organizations like the DUI Victim Center of Kansas. They have not only provided us with valuable information that we've needed as we have had to traverse our way through the legal proceedings involved with the trial of this woman, but also, their comfort, support, and compassion have been immeasurable to us. Jim Pykiet has been a true and loving friend for Shane's family. And, the beautiful Candlelight Vigil the DU1 Victim Center holds each year during the Christmas holiday season is such a loving way for the families of victims of senseless drinking and driving crimes to come and honor and remember their loved ones. We will always treasure the many benefits afforded to us by this organization. |
